And so the erections are rising up fast in front of us.
As the popularity contest reaches its final stages, the candidates will set up camp on Houghton Street in a sad and desperate attempt to fool the electorate. With the ballot closing on Thursday, all of our noble politicos must judge when to begin the bordering-on-illegal harassment of unsuspecting LSE voters. In the GenSec race, eager Steve 'Now-I'm-a-feckin'-YouTube-celebrity' Wall wants to start on Monday, which the other lounge-abouts are whining over, presumably because they're all bloody lazy and fat on the inside.
The following is the Hack Attack's insider insight into the pick of the possible gimmicks that will be used on The Street:
Aled - A huge balloon that he invites people to fart in, demonstrating how much carbon dioxide our combined digestive systems leak into the atmosphere
Abz - Isn't present, as he is hospitalised by a No. 68 bus after thinking the street teams were meant to be operating in the middle of the Aldwych
Daisy - Wears a bikini made of a thousand daises, which later falls off 'accidentally'
Gabz - Topless lap-dancers on roller-skates
Hallet - Gets a Mohican and grows handle-bar mustache
Sheldon - Distributes free copies of his body work-out DVD 'How I got a six pack...of beers across my midriff'
Wall - Downs a pint of Guinness through a straw whilst snorting a whole box of Lucky Charms and screaming 'Feck!' at the top of his voice
Very talented indeed.
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1 comment:
I had a dream last night that the beaver decided to publish a diagram of how influential various people are within the SU and the school (as they sometimes used to do) by drawing a monopoly board with streets replaced by people. Of the few I remember, Old Kent Road was a member of the exec(whose name I'll withold for the time being)who probably wouldn't be too happy about being put there.
The Beaver had placed themselves at Mayfair and Park Lane was a box of Ferrero Rocher.
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