A fishy affair

Bogus BeerCan feels muscular and defiant.


He holds his head up high - smug and proud that his authoritah is allowing his decision to go against the following people:

• All the current sabbs
• All the current exec
• All the sabb-elects
• All the new exec
• All human beings that have brains - fully or partially functioning

Essentially, the dealio is that Whiny-Moany Roberts and 'Em..-fuck-the-rules' Fishy are going to battle it out in the gladiator arena that is the Old Theatre for their crown as Residences Officer in a rare Summer Term UGM.

This Hack-a-Caesar knows that he's got his way not because he threw a strop, cried for a day, and humiliatingly wet himself, but because he has been secretly having steamy antics with the Constitution. Their erotic relationship has warped BeerCan's mind, as love tends to do. Simultaneously, Ketters, after hearing the news of the Constitution and BeerCan, has gone to Oxford to try and cop off with theirs.

He's got a good chance; it's a bit of a slag.