Runners and riders...

Electi-what? Sabba-who?

It's that time again. With the fall of Akpan-Fisher regime in sight, which 'ordinary' students think £28k is a fair price for a year of abuse and rapid weight gain. Taking our finger off the 'Ignore Friend Request' button for a minute, we'll outline the candidates for the upcoming elections. Not the non-sabb ones, though, cos who cares?

GenSex
Charlotte 'Makes-Me' Harder - "charity is great! students are great! yay! charlotte is great! yay" - sneak preview of the manifesto, there.
Rob 'Charred' Cock - 25% pay-cut, eh? He'll be regretting that in a few months! With Mr. BeerCan and STDeepend on his team, how can he lose?! (Hint: by taking their advice).

AU Sabb (Sorry, Activities and Development)
Charlie Gym - is anybody else seriously thinking about running? Seriously? I think even RON is thinking about pulling out of this one.

Minister for Social Affairs and Citizenship (MoSaC)
Hero 'Stole Cold' Austin - running on a clear 'green' ticket.
Olly 'Peter' Townsend - running on a clear 'banter' ticket.

Education, Education, Education
Andrew 'Ian' Wright - going for the 'I know more than you approach' only works if you're standing against a club promoter.
'Griff' Rhys Jones - Oh.

Not yet declared:
The Fadhil-Sheldon 'Dream Ticket'
The Token Lefty
The 'Reza 4 Caliphate Officer' Campaign